Christians and divorce

I’ve read repeatedly of research which found that Christians divorce as much as everyone else in America, and I simply accepted that. A researcher recently did a study that was a little different. What he found was that, yes, on average Christians divorce as much as persons who are not Christians. But he found that Christians who actually tried to live the Jesus way divorced significantly less, and Christians who were pretty much that in name only and weren’t really trying to pattern their lives after Christ actually divorced significantly more than the religiously non-affiliated. So, being a nominal Christian is actually dangerous to marriages. Now, that’s interesting.

don’t need the church

A survey by “Lost and Found” discovered that 90% of unchurched 20-29 year olds believe: “I can have a good relationship with God without being involved in a church.” I’m pondering that. In one way it seems understandable to me, given how many people have experienced the church as condemning, harsh, mean-spirited, unGodly. But the church the way God meant it be—the living body of Christ in the world where love and grace and challenge and accountability and compassion and serving are to overflow—well, it’s not really possible to have a good relationship with God and not connect with his body the church in a deeply involved way when that’s understood.

plan ahead

John Maxwell offers these steps to plan ahead. Predetermine Your Course of Action. Lay Out Your Goals. Adjust Your Priorities. Notify Key Personnel. Allow Time for Acceptance. Head into Action. Expect Problems. Always Point to Your Successes. Daily Review Your Progress.

is that normal?

A woman recently started coming to worship at Journey. She’s made the decision to become a follower of Jesus. She asks question after question as she seeks to learn and grow spiritually. We talked last night, and she said that a couple of times lately in our services, she’s felt very emotional, like she wanted to cry. She says it’s not a sad feeling, just a wave of emotion. She’s held it in during services because she didn’t want to disturb anyone, but when she rides home in her car she just weeps. She wonders if God is trying to communicate something to her. She asked “is that normal?”

toxic fumes

Today I finished teaching a message series called “Toxic.” At the end of one service I found a bag anonymously left for me. In it was a pair of black underwear that had two yellow toxic symbols on the back with the words “Toxic Fumes.” Only at Journey.

if he was still alive

I called and talked with my mom last night. She lives in a care facility in Richmond, VA. I mentioned that I had been thinking about my dad. She said she had too. Yesterday would have been my dad's 84th birthday. This fall it will be 10 years since he passed away. In our conversation mom asked something that I'd never really thought about. She asked: "What do you think dad would be like now if he was still alive?" I stumbled to come up with an answer. In the early hours of this morning while I tried to sleep , repeatedly this question popped into my mind. My dad and I didn't communicate particularly well together. But as he battled cancer in his last year of life, our relationship took a different turn. He was afraid to be in the hospital alone. So whenever he went, he wanted me to stay in his room with him, and I did. It was odd for me to see this man whom I had always seen as so strong looking to me for assurance. I'm so grateful that as an adult I finally was able to tell him I loved him. I don't ever remember doing that when I was young. He died on Thanksgiving Day. I was standing beside his bed holding his hand when he departed this world for the next. Though I have trouble envisioning what he might be like if he was still alive here on earth (I'm not sure why I struggle with this) I'm glad I know that when my dad needed me, I was there for him. As his health was failing, he repeatedly told people there was one thing he could count on: "Michael will make sure I'm taken care of right." I take peace in that.

the four E’s

Jack Welch, the ex-GE chief, says he looks for four leadership qualities in executives. He calls them the four E’s: someone who has energy; who energizes others; who has edge (someone who can say “yes” or “no” decisively); and who can execute. Sounds like four qualities that should be found in every church leader whether vocational or volunteer.

missing it

People are coming to faith in Christ at an amazing rate. The world is becoming more and more Christian with a growth rate of 82,000 new believers per day. Cuba has seen one million new Christians over the past ten years. God is working among Muslims in great ways, particularly through dreams and visions of Jesus. One thing is constant in the swell of enthusiasm for the gospel—it’s not happening in the United States. South Korea now boasts five of the ten largest churches in the world and sends out more missionaries than the U. S. Only 23 percent of Americans are in church on Sundays, and the fastest growing religious demographic is the one that claims “no religion.” God is on the march. The Holy Spirit is on the move. But America is missing it.

forgiveness, well, maybe

In the recent study “Survey of Love and Forgiveness in American Society” it was found that Americans crave forgiveness (no surprise there) but are choosy when it comes to dispensing it (sadly, not much surprise there either.) Sixty-two percent of American adults said they need more forgiveness in their personal lives, and 94 percent wanted to see more forgiveness in the country. Americans express a near-universal desire for a more loving and unified world. Researchers found that even though the U.S. is composed of people who are usually forgiving, more than half of Americans said there are situations where people should never be forgiven. The survey found that a majority of Americans also believe forgiveness is conditional: 60 percent said “forgiving someone would first depend on the offender apologizing and making changes.” Forgive us, God, even when we don’t understand what forgiveness means.

healing

Brokenness. Hurt. Heartache. Occasionally their cause is beyond my control. But, honestly, really honestly, much of the brokenness I know in life I bring upon myself. Wrong choices. Inaccurate perceptions—of myself, others, even God. Self-esteem gets shattered. Relationships are wrecked. Damage is done. What’s needed? James 5:16 says: “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” For wholeness to happen, confession is compulsory. A community of people who really care and who will challenge me is essential. Otherwise, nothing happens. I stay the same. For life change to occur, to grow as a follower of Jesus, genuine repentance is required. I don’t like this. I’d rather do things my way. I’d rather ignore the faults in my own life and instead focus on fixing the flaws in the lives of others. Pride. Insecurity. They’re what lead to the brokenness in my life and are the barriers to my healing. That’s true of me.

to find yourself

I received this email from someone I met with yesterday to talk about serving at Journey. “I had a meeting with a client last night that just happens to be a psychiatrist. On his office wall was this saying: ‘The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.’”

life changing moment

One of the persons who was baptized on Sunday just sent me this: “I have not stopped talking about the baptism. It was so special and overwhelming in so many ways. The support from Journey Church was unbelievable, and the atmosphere was one of reverence and joy. I will not forget the day—it’s a life changing moment and such a wonderful feeling.”